Exciting writing

We have several native/near native English speakers at our school. They do some more challenging activities during our class English lessons. Philip Klinkenberg (group 6/7) tried combining action with good descriptions and feelings. Do you think he has created an exciting atmosphere?

 

…They pushed us roughly into a small, silver shining cellar with metal walls. They said that we would never get out alive. They ran and locked the door quickly. There was no light in the cold cellar and we were terrified. Suddenly we heard water rushing loudly.

They were trying to drown us! James, one of us, was looking for an opening. He shouted, “Look there is a tiny door.” We all looked at the small wooden door. Emily exclaimed, “How in the world are we going to get up there?”…..